


Mentionitis

by Caedmon



Series: Doctor/Rose Prompts [27]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Bets & Wagers, Drabble, F/M, Jack and Rose are bros, Timepetalsprompts, prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-05-26 21:36:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6256759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caedmon/pseuds/Caedmon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rose is in love with the Doctor and Jack thinks he can prove it. They have a little bet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! My regular notes....
> 
> I own nothing but the mistakes.   
> Kudos and comments are the life blood of the muse. <3 Thank you for them.  
> Come talk to me! caedmonfaith.tumblr.com

“You, my dear Rosie, have got mentionitis,” Jack accused, leveling a finger at her.

“What are you talking about?”

“It’s when you fancy someone so much that you can’t stop talking about them. It’s like a sickness. Mentionitis.”

Rose crossed her arms, smirking. “And you think I’m afflicted with your little made-up disease?”

“Oh yeah. You’ve got it _bad_. You can’t go more than three sentences without mentioning the Doctor.”

“S’not true,” she sulked.

“Tell you what,” he said, leaning forward, “let’s make it interesting. Tomorrow, I’ll pick a random hour, and I’m going to keep count. Every time you say the Doctor’s name, you owe me a credit. If you get through the hour owing me less than twenty credits, I’ll give them all back and say I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, alright,” Rose said, one corner of her mouth turned up. “But you’d better be ready to apologize."

“I hope you’re ready to crack that piggy bank, Tyler.”

“Dream on, Harkness,” she snickered.

~*~O~*~

The next day found Rose scowling, handing thirty-three credits over to a beaming Jack.

“See, Rosie? Mentionitis. I told you! I knew you couldn’t shut up about the Doctor. Maybe you should _mention_ to the man himself that you’re afflicted with this dread disease and can’t shut up about him.” 

Rose flushed. “Don’t you _dare_ tell him about this...nonsense mentionitis, Jack Harkness!”

Jack snorted. “You think he’s not aware of it? I won fifty-four credits off of him this morning with the exact same bet.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor loses money to Jack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the comments on the first chapter, someone said they'd like to know how the bet between the Doctor and Jack played out. The idea wouldn't leave me alone, so here it is.
> 
> Thank you so much for kudos and comments! <3

Jack smirked to himself; he really should be ashamed of himself. He was, of course, no such thing. Rather proud of himself, in fact.

The Doctor was crouched under the console, aiming his sonic at nothing in particular, talking. “...I told Rose to stay away from the hot springs, but you know her. Like talking to a brick wall sometimes, she is. So of course she trudges right over to those hot springs and dips her toe in, like she owns the place. The royal guard didn’t take too kindly to that, as you can imagine.” 

This was too easy. Jack just bided his time while the Doctor talked, clicking the counter in his pocket so quickly he thought his thumb would likely be sore after. 

“Say, come to think of it, if she liked the hot springs we should take her to Diflora. There are some lovely geysers there that spray water in various colors, and the scenery there is just breathtaking. The monarchy there is friendly as well, have balls and whatnot all the time. Rose loves going to balls. She would love it, don’t you think?”

“Time,” Jack called, incongruous to the Doctor’s last statement, pulling the counter out and ignoring the curious look the Time Lord was casting him. 

“Time for what?”

“You owe me fifty-four credits.”

“Pish-posh,” the Doctor scoffed. “I never accepted your bet, and I told you that the whole concept of ‘mentionitis’ was ludicrous.”

“Ludicrous or not, you owe me a great deal of money. Cough it up.”

The Doctor huffed at him. “Not doing nothing, me. You’re making all of this up.”

“I kept a count, Doctor. You either said Rose’s name or a pronoun referring to her fifty-four times. Pay up.”

“I did no such thing.”

“Shall I have the Tardis verify me? Perhaps keep a count of her own, or replay the conversation?”

The Doctor’s eyes went a bit distant for just a moment, taking on the look Jack had come to associate with listening to his time ship, and then he suddenly scowled mightily. “No need,” he mumbled, leaning back down to his work.

“There’s a cure for this, you know.”

“Can’t be a cure for something that doesn’t exist,” the Doctor snapped.

“Of course it does. Didn’t I just prove it?”

“Shut up, Harkness.”

“All you have to do,” Jack said, leaning back in the jump seat and crossing his ankles, “is tell the girl how you feel.” The Doctor scoffed, but Jack went on, twirling his hand extravagantly. “Tell her...tell her that your skin thirsts for the slide of hers against it. Tell her that your eyes have seen nothing more beautiful in their hundreds of years than the sparkle in her own. Tell her that her laughter is music and you want to dance.” 

Jack’s grin turned lascivious. “Tell her you’re in love with her and want to shag her rotten, want to shag her until she can’t remember her name and walks like a cowboy.”

The Doctor bolted upright and snarled at Jack. “You watch your tongue, _Captain_. You’re speaking about Rose.”

“I didn’t say _I_ wanted to, did I?” he said with an innocent expression that couldn’t hide a wide smile. “I said you should tell Rose how _you_ feel.”

“Bollocks to that,” the Doctor groused, and bent back to his work again. “This whole disease - bet - _thing_ was a joke. The premise of the bet is laughable, and then you rigged it so you'd win. You know I tend to prattle on while I work under the console.”

“Yes, but you prattle about _her_.”

“I talk about lots of things,” he protested. “I’ll prove it. Your choice. Pick a topic that has nothing at all to do with Rose. What would you like to talk about?”

“Tell me about the last book you read.”

“Easy. I’ve been re-reading Great Expectations. Brilliant story, that is. Pip is a highly relatable character. Very well-written.”

“Oh yeah?”

“You’ve never read Dickens?”

“Not Great Expectations.”

“Great man, Dickens. He was clever under pressure.” The Doctor looked smug suddenly. “Jealous of me, he was. When we met him, Rose had dressed for an evening out. I wish you could have seen ol’ Charlie-boy’s face when Rose kissed his cheek, then stepped into the Tardis with this daft old face!” The Doctor pointed at his face, giving his _look-how-clever-I-am_ grin, then went on. “He was right to be jealous, though. Rose was fantastic that night. Clever as always. Impressive. Should have seen her telling off ol’ Sneed for copping a feel!” The Doctor laughed, delighted by the memory, then his voice softened. “She was stunning that night. Not that she’s not always gorgeous, you understand. But something about that night seemed magical. I saw her in a completely new way that night in Cardiff.”

The Doctor’s voice trailed off, and Jack just smirked at him, not speaking. Waiting. The penny would drop.

After a couple of moments, the Doctor’s face screwed up in self-directed angst, realizing what he had just done. 

Jack held out his hand wordlesly, and the Doctor scowled. Jack accepted the handful of credits with a brilliant grin. 

“Take your money and shove off, Harkness,” the Doctor muttered.


End file.
